#funeral to my twenties
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bellaso-bomb · 2 years ago
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This is 30 Happy Aries Day #♈️🐏
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justachoker · 9 months ago
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backslide really feels like a letter from clancy to torchbearer and the banditos and i wanna cry and then die because of that
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clancysjumpsuit · 5 months ago
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for those who want to hear the bandito and jumpsuit mashup, click here
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todayisafridaynight · 9 months ago
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I’m fairly new to the fandom, but I do have a question if you can answer it! Why do people ship Daigo with Aoki / Masato? I tried looking to see if they’ve interacted before, but couldn’t find anything! Sorry for asking I’m just </3 dumb AND I LOVE YOUR ART OF THEM!!! Nerd looking ahhhhhh
hi ! welcome to the community i hope you're having a lovely time so far and ty for enjoyin my stuff :) no need for apologies it's a very fair question to have :]
i cant speak for everyone (all. ten people into masadai anyway) but Personally To Me i just think the idea of them together is very funny. thats quite literally it im afraid..
#snap chats#//twenty page google doc in the background// ignore that. it's mostly for comedic purposes#might also be my fault idk sorry about that. allegedly. idk ive had like three people tell me they started to ship them cause of me 🧍‍♂️#@mementoasts is another person who's drawn masadai and whose stuff i love and am inspod by .. i love their disneyland fic sm ...#there was another artist on twitter who posted a neat drawing of them but i cant remember who they were and i didnt bookmark it //screams//#recently there's been ANOTHER masadai artist ive started following on twitter - @wifekiryu. his account's n/s/f/w fyi before you go looking#he has a tumblr too @foxdies. i say cause i realized as much recently vjeaKLGJALKGJ#oh but I GUESS ill get deeper into why. /i/ personally ship masadai or whatever#first off they're opposing factions yet their character alignments Do Not Match their roles. stereotypically anyway#aoki who leads the 'surface' of society and is meant to be an admirable figure and someone 'just' when really. he sucks LMAO#though that's not atypical of politicians but just from a stereotypical This Is A Respectable Individual perspective of his role#daigo on the other hand leads the 'underbelly' of society- yk comprised of dangerous criminals and outcasts and whatnot#yet as we know him daigo's compassionate and considerate of his men- he doesnt treat them like tools like aoki does#if put in a room with the two daigo would be most people's choice of person to hang out with. probably open a trapdoor on aoki tbh#and i think thats really cool and epic i always love that kinda Subverting Expectations thing#theres also the fact they both started off like. edgy/angsty in the franchise and then brush up down the line#masato does a stronger 180. publicly. obviously but its still really funny they both have to get their act together#if you wanna talk about in-text reasons. there really is none LMAO I TELLS YOU masadai is pure crack#but if i wanted to pull a muscle reaching then there's daigo being on aoki's side while everyone else is on arakawa's during the funeral#im lying of course. mitsu was behind him. rgg tryna make me forget mitsu exist .... put him back in y8 ....#and ofc ichi joins that side to even out the seating but moving on another Goofy Reason is arakawa being like#'the chairman and my son are like p much the same age Surely he knows how he thinks :)'#and then i just think daigo being all smarmy about outsmarting aoki is really goofy and im choosing to interpret that as personal#they both also have issues with their dad. s. dad/s/. anyway.#tbh the google doc tag was a joke but i really could sit here and list every dumb reason why i think theyre funny together#like i started going over the tag limit so uhhhh yeah needless to say i have a lot of. dumb reasons 💀💀💀💀#one day ill use the main text for long rambles like this but todays not that day Point Is my imagination is rampant im afraid#so the short and sweet of it is I Think It's Funny. And They'd Be Terrible Together. Which Is Why It's Funny.#and the unfortunate part is anything i find funny i obsess over for a year so. //gestures to the mountain of bullshit thats my masadai tag/
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jevilowo · 9 months ago
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Napoleon complex is so Rarjack coded send tweet
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cavswife · 4 months ago
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when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers or moots (positivity is cool) 💖
favourite followers or moots...bucky you're too sweet ;m; <3 my darling @lipsticklens also sent this adorable lil game to me so I'll answer for both y'all here! givin' each of you a big ol' forehead kiss as I write this :)c
My favourite songs are always changing, but as of late I've had the following gnawing at my brain ( in no specific order hehe ) ...
No, You Don't - Nine Inch Nails
It's A Sin - Pet Shop Boys
My Life is Over and I Couldn't Be Happier - PUP
Sacrifice - London After Midnight
Majesty - Ghost
thank you for the cute ask my dears, I needed a lil pick me up after more dental work today :,) the world better be treating y'all both nicely today, or I'll have to hit some people with my hammers to fix it!!
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steelycunt · 1 year ago
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YAY DRUNK STEEELY?? Omg. OK WHATS YOU FAV SMITHS SONG AND ALSO BEATLES SONG.
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god bless you anon you sent this WEEKS ago but. I’d sobered up by the time i saw it and it felt wrong to reply in that state..however i have been saving it and can now say that my favourite smiths song is RUSHOLME RUFFIANS and my favourite Beatles songs are MARTHA MY DEAR, A DAY IN THE LIFE and IN MY LIFE. merry christmas!!
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hmslusitania · 6 months ago
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I knew from reading *about* him, I didn’t like Terry Long? But having now read more comics where he’s substantively present, let me just say from the bottom of my heart, fuck that guy
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majestativa · 1 year ago
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I'm no longer twenty! I'm rising, more and more secure, more and more beautiful, from the foam of approximations. My thoughts no longer hang on thin threads like sprider legs. I've lost the sterile clumsiness and the panic when contemplating infinity.
— Nina Cassian, Cheerleader for a Funeral: Poems, (1993)
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godblooded · 2 years ago
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hey like y’all know you can write trans characters that aren’t just a transman or a transwoman right??? like you guys know enby identities aren’t transphobic????
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louisdotmp3 · 1 year ago
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i just think some people can visit their childhood through place and people in a way that's really significant & often taken for granted and then there's people for whom those places and those people no longer exist at all and there is no way back
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writterings · 4 months ago
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gravity falls is so funny through robbie's pov
>be me, 15 year old emo in a bumfucknowhere town
>lives in a funeral home. my parents embalm bodies twenty feet and an entire wall away from where we cook dinner
>have a friend i want to be my girlfriend
>she starts hanging out with her boss' (???) twin niece and nephew outside of work hours even though they're like in elementary school
>friend becomes your girlfriend
>weird shit happens around these twins. conscience store ghosts, a weirdly pixelated adult man beating you up, your dirt bike gets stolen, your girlfriend's boss and his nephew make your gf break up with you???
>gets memories erased at some point
>suddenly in love with only other female friend, like instantly in love and it's like this came out of nowhere but she's so perfect and you loooooove her it's so great don't question why there's a part of you that doesn't remember ever actually falling in love with her. also those fucking twins had something to do with this again.
>apocalypse happens
>mfw im apparently part of a secret key of people that can save the world by holding hands but it gets fucked up last minute by your ex's boss fighting with his twin over grammar (did he always have a twin?? why are there so many twins??)
>the ritual you were a part of failed. you were supposed to be a special person and part of saving the world but nope. that failed.
>get turned into a statue
>apocalypse ends and you have no clue how or why
>things like immediately go back to normal
>still with girl you don't remember falling in love with
>the twins just fucking. leave the town. and now there's two of your ex girlfriend's bosses around. no one ever explains how or why any of this has happened. you still live in a funeral home.
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interiorlulus · 6 months ago
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I've managed to avoid going to see my maternal grandparents in France but at what cost (deep, profound shame).
#context: they live in bumfuck nowhere southern area the next town over is top 5 worst most boring place in the country#you can't get anywhere without a car#it's close to the beach but not close enough without a car AND it's NOT the côte d'azur lemme tell you#you can't even go on a walk bc 1) mosquitoes 2) the heat 3) the sights suck ass#like there's no hidden charm or anything. out of ALL the gorgeous places in France (of which there are PLENTY) my gps decided on THAT#did i mention my grandparents are separated but live together bc they got married in the sexist 60s? so my grandma doesn't own shit?#and my grandfather is senile in all the worst ways and she has to care for him bc he has dozens of medical issues#there's at least one or two fights between them when we go there and he is a grade A asshole#to give you an idea: my mom once said ''she wouldn't want people to not want to go to her funeral''#so yeah not even his children like him#my aunt who lives close by (1h30m in car lmao) is a secondary school teacher so it's always complaining complaining complaining#and i'm stuck listening to people 50+ who are completely disconnected from me bc they haven't had a proper conversation with me since 2012#''oh why don't you travel with friends instead?'' i'm ashamed to admit i lack independence and drive to do so. and i barely have friends#i want to really badly. i keep telling my friend who lives between granada/coimbra i should come see her but i don't know how to begin#it's so embarrassing at my age to be this helpless and i hate it#i'm in my twenties! i should move around and try new stuff! but i'm so afraid my inexperience and immaturity will show#i keep turning to my mom for help and that also doesn't help bc without her i don't push myself forth#i'm just so ashamed of being myself rn#this turned into one hell of a vent#me.txt
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queenangella · 1 year ago
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my moms disappointed in me that I told my aunt to shut up and follow my grandmas schedule cause she tried to force dessert out so she could leave earlier but what is she gonna do? ignore me? did that already for two years. look mad at me? would be like n improvement from last years Christmas where she literally didn’t look at me once let alone talk to me
#actually was kinda different I just can’t stand when I say my opinion and other people are like ‘well I just won’t say anything anymore the#:)’#she was like ‘okay you can decide everything and I wont say anything anymore:)’ and I was like ‘yeah that’s right cause this is not your#fucking house so you don’t actually get to decide everything:) shut up:)’#no one fucking likes you and your cheap ass gifts and your mediocre grocery store bought snacks#now my moms like ok next time just be quiet and go along with her to keep the peace like bitch I will literally start a feud I don’t care#I should keep the peace?? bc if there’s be a feud people would side with me over her ten times over#you really think people will side with her when I’m the one who helped set everything up and made gourmet aperos and gave my grandma#something handcrafted to thank her for hosting us while she cant barely bother to show up at her own mom twice a year at Christmas and#easter?? bc she lives a whole two hours away?? bitch when I lived three countries over I saw my grandma more than you did#your husband wasn’t even allowed out of the house for his own dads funeral you think even he’s gonna side with you?? bitch#don’t wanna sound like a snob cause I really don’t care about cheap gifts or grocery story snacks but you have to realise she and her#husband are both doctors and rich and they have a nanny for their twenty year old kids who also cooks and cleans and they live right next to#two famous people and have a vacation house in portugal and also zero friends you really tell me she can’t do better than a five euro gift#for secret Santa when the decided on amount was twenty euros?
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animeboye · 1 year ago
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New Dragon’s World Chapter 27.5
Chapter 27.5: Day 2 part 2, Burying the Dead The next day, it was early in the afternoon. Kyle was laying in bed with a bad hangover. Sean and Crystal sat on the bed opposite to Kyle and were taking great pleasure in lecturing him about alcohol abuse. Receiving a lecture from two grade school kids only served to irritate Kyle even more. He wasn't sure what was worse: his hangover or being lectured by his younger cousin's friends. Lucas had taken Tim over to Adam's to play. Sarah, Ben, Jackie, and Jessie decided to explore the town a little more.  At the suggestion of Jessie, they also decided to check out the bookstore later on. Titus sat in his car, listening to one of his CDs, the cool air from the air conditioner  spraying him in the face. He tapped his fingers on the dashboard and stared off into space. He watched as his mother and Eig'nia walked past. He stepped out of his car, locked the door, and followed after them. He noticed that they were headed in the direction of where Drake fought Alex. "Hey! Mom, Eig'nia, wait up!" Titus called out. "Where are you going?" He asked. "Your mother and I are going to go get Theian, Girido, and Rikai's bodies. We're going to take them to the dragon realm to be buried." Eig'nia explained. "I think I'm going to come too." Titus said, inviting himself. "You still don't trust me, do you? Doulstraz, I really am on your side. I'm not going to do anything to hurt her, I promise." "It's not that…I just want to pay my last respects to Theian." Titus explained.
"Alright then, son. We could use the extra muscle anyway.  So I think we should first get Rikai's body since his is closer." Said Titus' mom. "That's a good idea. Doulstraz, are you okay with that?" Asked Eig'nia. "Yeah...That's okay." Titus said dully. "Doulstraz, I know how you feel. I don't want to see his face either after what he did. But I know your dad's going to make it through this. Trust me, he will." His mom smiled. Titus smiled back at her and nodded. The three of them reverted to their dragon forms. Their wings unfolded into the hot afternoon air and they took to flight.  They flew for a short time before spotting Rikai's body below them. They descended and landed before it. His eyes were shut, his mouth gaped open, his long, forked tongue hanging out of it. Dried blood had clung to his snout. His right wing was draped over his body like a blanket while his left wing lay under him. Titus couldn't bear to look at Rikai's deceased form. Just thinking about the state he put his father in made Titus' blood boil. "So how are we going to do this?" Asked Titus' mom. Eig'nia opened up a portal. She pushed Rikai's body into it and jumped in with Titus and his mom following behind her. Upon arriving in the dragon realm, they found themselves standing behind a cave. Rikai's body lay in front of them. "Hey, Doulstraz, would you be able to carry Rikai on your back?" Eig'nia asked. "I can try but I don't think I'll be able to carry a dragon of his size all by myself." He said. "We'll help you carry him. Now the graveyard shouldn't be too far from here. If I remember correctly, it should be that way?" Eig'nia said, pointing to their right. Titus lay down on his stomach as Eig'nia and his mom pushed Rikai's body onto his back. Titus tried to stand up but he collapsed under Rikai's weight. He tried standing up once again, calling upon all the strength he could muster. Just before he collapsed yet again, the two dragonesses got next to him and helped him to lift the body up. Titus' mom carried Rikai by his tail while Titus himself carried him by his stomach and underside and Eig'nia carried him by his head. He had to pause every now and then to take a breather. For some strange reason, he noticed that his mother and Eig'nia weren't exhibiting any signs of exhaustion. "Hey… *huff huff*…why aren't you guys getting tired?" Titus asked, panting heavily. "Probably because we've had to do this before. You see, Doulstraz, when a dragon dies, that dragon's three closest friends and/or relatives will carry the departed dragon on their backs to the gravesite where he or she will be buried." Eig'nia explained. "I had to do it when your grandma and grandpa died, and your father did the same for his parents." His mom said. "Me and my siblings did it for our parents. But I was the only one to carry my friend." Eig'nia said sadly.
"The youngest dragon of the deceased's clan will then go to obtain a soapstone big enough to carve the deceased's name into." Titus' mom finished explaining. "A soapstone? You mean you have those in the dragon realm?" Titus asked, surprised. "Well they're harder to find here than they are in the human realm. Because of that, the youngest dragons often go to the human realm to find these stones. If they're really young, an older sibling or other relative will accompany them to the human realm. Aaah…and here we are at our destination." Eig'nia said. The three of them came to a small hill. A cave, noticeably smaller than the others they had seen but still of considerable size, lay atop the hill which was covered in many soapstones.  They were all lined up neatly in a manner similar to the gravestones in the human realm. "We'll leave Rikai's body here for now. Knowing the gravekeeper, he's probably sleeping away." Said Eig'nia. They dumped Rikai's body next to the side of the cave. Titus opened up another portal and they stepped inside. Once they had gotten back to the human realm, they found themselves a mile away from the motel they had stayed at a few days prior. Titus, his mother, and Eig'nia all ran towards the wrecked building. They spotted the bodies of Theian and Girido. Titus' mom gasped loudly at the sight of her nest son's corpse. "Oh…no…" Her voice shook. She didn't want to believe what she was seeing. She sat down, put her paw over her snout and began to cry. Titus tried his best to comfort his mom but found that he too was beginning to feel sad. He looked to his right to see the destroyed car that belonged to the motel owner. The owner's body had been crushed under his car, his left arm dangling out of the wreckage all covered in dried blood. "Doulstraz!" Eig'nia called. "Yeah?" Replied Titus. "By any chance do you have the human blood needed to turn Saulstrance into a human?" Asked Eig'nia. "Nuh-no…" Titus said. "You've gotta be kidding! How were you planning to beat him then?!" Eig'nia snapped. "What! Mom, do you have any clue what she's talking about?" Titus' mom dried her tears. "Don't you remember, Doulstraz? I told you before that you would need the blood of a human in order to turn Saulstrance into one." His mom said. "Oh, crap! I forgot all about that! Aww no—what am I supposed to do now?!" Titus panicked. Eig'nia sighed. "Will you relax? There is an alternative." She said in an aggravated voice. "And what's that?" Titus asked. "Someone is going to have to cast the spell needed to trap him in human form. Doulstraz's mom, you've used the spell before, haven't you?" "Well, yes I have. But I won't be able to use it again without killing myself." Titus' mom answered. "I wasn't going to suggest that you do it. If you can teach me the spell, then I'll be the one to cast it." Eig'nia declared. "Alright, I will. But for now, let's get these two to our realm." Suggested Titus' mom. Titus opened a portal and his mom and Eig'nia pushed the bodies of Theian and Girido into it. They stepped through as the portal closed behind them. "Hey, mom, why did you say you would die if you used that spell?" Titus asked. "Every time a dragon uses that spell, the dragon who cast said spell loses some of its lifespan." She explained. "Ouch!" Replied a surprised Titus. "Yeah…it's a useful spell but it comes with a very dire consequence. Although, whether or not that is a consequence depends on whom you're asking…" "What do you mean?" Titus asked Eig'nia, confused by what she meant. Eig'nia was silent for a moment. "I offered to perform the spell because after this…I won't have anything left. Because of my age, I assume I'll probably have only 50 years left to live." She said with a sad smile. "So what will you do then…once this is all over?" Titus asked, concerned. Eig'nia didn't answer. She sighed to herself just as they were about to enter the dragon realm. They appeared before the graveyard where they found the gravekeeper inspecting Rikai's body. Eig'nia called to him. He turned around and his eyes lit up upon seeing her. "Well I'll be! Eig'nia, is that you?! Oh-ho! And here I was worrying that you had died! How have you been?" He asked cheerfully. "You know him?" Titus asked. "He was an acquaintance of mine in my younger years." Answered Eig'nia. "Hang on. Why did you think I was dead?" She asked, sounding offended. "Oh…well, uh, you see, I heard rumors that Saulstrance met his end 20 years ago. I was worried that you were with him." Eig'nia frowned, looking more serious. "Actually…" She explained to the gravekeeper everything that had transpired up until her eventual joining with Titus. The gravekeeper, with a look of disappointment on his face, lowered his head and shook it. "I see…if it wasn't for that night so long ago…none of this would be happening…" He said sadly. Eig'nia nodded in agreement, looking away from him. "And these three were followers of Saulstrance, you say?" He asked. "…Yeah…"  Eig'nia said softly. "…Well, I should probably get started. Luckily for you guys, I happen to have four soapstones in my cave. I'll get to work on making their gravestones. Now if I could just have their names?" "Girido, Rikai, and Theian." Eig'nia answered. "Girido, Rikai, and Theian…Alright. This will only take a short while. In the meantime, you can look around. Perhaps you'll find someone you know." The gravekeeper said. The gravekeeper dragged Theian's and Girido's bodies next to Rikai's and went back into his cave. "Doulstraz, could you come with me? There's something I would like to show you." His mom said. Titus followed behind her as she walked down several rows of graves. She took a left and walked several more feet before stopping at the end of the row. "Look right here." She said, pointing to one of the stones. Titus sat down. He lowered his head to get a better look at the stone. His eyes widened and it felt as though a sharp jolt went through his heart. His voice trembled as he slowly read the name inscribed on the stone. "An…gela…" Titus said. Titus sat before her grave, silent, looking down at her gravestone. He took a deep breath. He squished his eyes together and reopened them, his head bobbing ever so slightly. "I asked the gravekeeper to make a stone for her…even though we didn't have a body…" His mom explained. Titus squished his eyes together once again. Tears rained down his face and he smiled a rather squishy looking smile. "Thanks, mom…This was the nicest thing you could've done for her." Titus said in a meek voice. Titus stood up and walked from Angela's grave. He opened a portal and was about to step through it. "Doulstraz, where are you going?" Asked his mom. "I'm going to go and get everyone…I want them to see this… I'll be back in a little bit." Time had passed and the sun was about to set. Titus returned with everyone, Rick included who sat in a wheelchair. Sarah was carrying an empty wine box with her. They met up with Titus' mom, Eig'nia, and the gravekeeper who was in the process of completing the gravestones. Titus led everyone down to Angela's gravestone. Everyone stared at the stone, a wave of sadness washing over them. "Ohhh…" Sarah said, beginning to cry.  She rested her head on Ben's shoulder as he tried to comfort her. Titus sat in front of her grave, staring down at it. He sighed heavily. He had the saddest look on his face that his friends had ever seen.  Sarah began to cry on Ben's shoulder which ended up resulting in Drake crying as well although he didn't understand why he was crying. Lucas approached Titus and squatted down behind him. "You okay, man?" He asked, worried for his best friend. "Titus…I didn't know her as long as you did but I thought she was a really good dragon. I'm sure she would have loved to meet Drake." Ben said, trying to comfort his little brother. Titus nodded slightly. "…Yeah…" Titus turned to Sarah. "Sarah, can I have that wine box?" He asked. Sarah took her head away from Ben's shoulder and handed her husband the empty box. She looked at him with tears in her eyes. Jackie walked up to her, placing her hand on Sarah's shoulder. "It's okay, Aunt Sarah." Said Jackie as she hugged Sarah. Titus rummaged through his pockets, pulling out Angela's scale. He looked at it for a long time. Everyone watched Titus, unsure of what he was about to do. He took the top of the box off and placed the scale inside. He then put the top over it and sat it on the ground. He changed into his dragon form and began to dig a small hole in front of her grave. "Titus!" Jessie said in shock. Having dug a hole big enough to place the wine box into, he reverted back to human form. He picked up the small box and looked at it. He squeezed the box and started to sniffle. "In the human realm, they bury people in these things called caskets. But this should suffice…" He said, his voice straining. "Doulstraz, you don't have to do this. That's important to you! You should—" "No…" He said, cutting Eig'nia off. "It's time that I let her go…"  He began to sniffle again. "Aww man!" "Doulstraz…" Titus' mom said sadly as she began to cry. He wiped the tears from his eyes and placed the box with Angela's scale in it into the hole he had just dug. He refilled the hole and patted the dirt. Everyone around him began to cry, Crystal, Sean, and Tim included. "Doulstraz, are you really sure about this?" Eig'nia asked with concern. "Yeah…Besides, I still have something of Angela's…something that I'll never part with…her heart. Angela's heart lives on in me." Sarah wiped the tears from her eyes and hugged Titus. Titus went up to his son who was still crying and gave him a warm hug too. Eig'nia opened up a portal and slowly, everyone began to step through it except for Titus, Sarah, Drake, and Titus' mom. "Aren't you guys coming?" Asked Eig'nia. "We'll catch up with you guys." Titus said. Eig'nia stepped through as the portal closed. The family looked down at Angela's grave once again. "Thank you for everything Angela. I mean it. You took care of me and Sarah when we had no one else to turn to. We owe you so much…and you know, I'll always miss you and it's always going to hurt but I know you don't want to see me sad…Well that's pretty much it. Please be sure to say hi to Theian for me." Titus said. "Is there anything you'd like to say, Sarah?" He asked. "Nothing that you haven't already said." She answered. "How about you, Drake?" Drake smiled at his dad and nodded. "Hi, Angela! I'm Drake! I wanted to say thank you for taking care of my mom and dad when they were as old as me. They've always told me really nice things about you. I really wish I coulda met you…" Drake said, starting to feel sad. "Was that okay, Dad?" Drake asked. Titus smiled warmly. "That was beautiful, son." "Mom, are you going to say anything?" Titus asked. His mom shook her head. She opened a portal in front of them. Sarah and Drake stepped through first. Titus was about to go through when he saw his mom still standing in the exact same spot. "Come on, mom." Titus said. "Alright." She smiled. As Titus disappeared into the portal, she looked down at her friend's grave. She smiled and said… "Goodbye, my friend. I'll never forget you." With that, the dragoness followed her family into the portal. As Titus traveled back to the human realm with his family, he felt strangely happy. Of course he was still a little sad but at the same time, he felt like he did the right thing in burying Angela's scale and giving her the peace she deserved. He realized that he wasn't the only one who had lost his loved ones…all of his friends and family had experienced it at one point. He also knew that they would always be there for him whenever he needed them…and he would always be there for them. Later that night, in the dragon realm a new gravestone was erected right next to Angela's. The grave was freshly dug which indicated that it was made not too long ago. This new gravestone was inscribed with the name "Theian".
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genshinluvr · 10 days ago
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Marks of the Dragons
Pairings: Various Genshin Men x Isekai'd!Reader, Neuvillette x Isekai'd!Reader, Zhongli x Isekai'd!Reader, Zhongli x Isekai'd!Reader x Neuvillette
Summary: Zhongli and Neuvillette marked you— they marked you by biting you. What lead up to that situation? You went on a trip to Chenyu Vale with the Chief Justice of Fontaine and Funeral Consultant of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor.
Note: My work schedule has been very inconsistent that I wasn't able to work on anything :< This smut is probably awful since I haven't written smut in so long. Before anyone new asks, yes, Kinich, Sethos, and Ororon are officially in the harem! Since I unknowingly manifested both Zhongli and Neuvillette's banners have a rerun together, I had to write a smut with the two finest men in Genshin. This idea is partially from the unpublished Zhongli smut I had in mind two years ago, so I had to make it a thing for both Zhongli and Neuvillette >:3 MINORS, DO NOT INTERACT. Anyway, I don't post anywhere else but on Tumblr (Genshinluvr), Ko-Fi (also Genshinluvr/Aaliah_exo), and AO3 (Aaliah_exo).
Warning: Horribly written smut, anal, oral, double penetration, blowjobs, hair pulling, choking, Zhongli and Neuvillette have two dicks, biting, marking, maybe mating???
Word Count: 7.1k
Everyone is lounging in the living room, sitting close to the fireplace, taking in the heat and cozy atmosphere—except for you. There’s an empty spot beside every man in the room, hoping you’ll cuddle up beside them. You’re still in your bedroom, preparing for the hangout. It’s freezing in the abode, which surprises everyone because who knew it could become freezing in the teapot? Heck, it looks like it might even snow by the looks of it. 
Scaramouche sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “What’s taking [Y/N] so long? We’ve been sitting here for twenty minutes, and they still haven’t left their bedroom.”
“Maybe they fell asleep?” Venti suggests, looking around the room.
The lights in the living room are off. The only source of light illuminating the dark room is the fireplace, casting a warm glow. 
Kaeya yawns, stretching his arms before sprawling out on the couch, rubbing his eye with his knuckle. “If [Y/N] doesn’t come out of their room by the time the clock strikes eight, I’m going to fall asleep,” Kaeya mutters, leaning over to snatch the fluffy blanket from Diluc’s lap, earning a glare from the redhead.
Diluc sharply exhales from his nostrils, pinching the space between his eyebrows. “Why can’t you get your own blanket instead of taking other people’s belongings?” Diluc grumbles, reaching over to yank the blanket from Kaeya’s body.
Dainsleif rolls his eyes before getting up from his spot and heading towards the staircase. The men stop what they’re doing, watching the blond man walk up the stairs. “Since everyone is impatient, I’ll check on them myself.”
Upstairs in the estate, you stare at your reflection in the mirror, pulling up your turtleneck. You rarely wear turtlenecks, but since it’s freezing in the abode, you might as well wear one. You leave your bathroom and grab the nearest jacket. Your neck is aching, and it hurts each time you twist or tilt your head. You zip up your jacket, making sure the bandage is hidden beneath both your jacket and turtleneck. 
You peek at your reflection in the full-length mirror, eyeing yourself from head to toe as you walk to your dresser for your fuzzy socks. You dig through the dresser, searching for the specific fuzzy sock you cherish (it kept your feet warm well because the men would complain about your feet being cold every time it brushed against their legs).
A gentle knock from your bedroom door pulls you out of your thoughts. You quickly put on your socks before rushing to answer the door. You take a deep breath and open the door, your heart thundering in your chest when you see Dainsleif in front of you.
You smile at the blond man. “Hey, Dainsleif! Sorry for taking so long. I was looking for a comfortable jacket to wear along with these fuzzy socks, " you say, looking down at your sock-clad feet. 
Before Dainsleif can say anything, Childe pops up from the corner, placing a rough hand on Dainsleif’s shoulders, causing him to grunt and glare at the Harbinger. “You took your sweet time, snookums. Were you trying to look pretty for me?” Childe teases, winking at you.
You playfully roll your eyes, shaking your head, only to stop abruptly and let out a sharp breath. Dainsleif and Childe look at you worriedly, scanning you from head to toe for any injuries. You clear your throat, plastering a fake smile on your face.
“You two have nothing to worry about, I promise. I’m done getting dressed, and we can all go downstairs now. Let’s go before the others become restless,” you say, stepping out of your bedroom and walking past Dainsleif and Childe. 
As you’re descending the stairs, both Childe and Dainsleif trade looks with one another before following behind you. Once the three of you reach the living room, everyone sighs in relief and gestures for you to sit beside them. You raise your eyebrows, crossing your arms over your chest. 
“I’m not sure if I can sit with every one of you at the same time.” You say, waddling farther into the living room. “Who am I sitting with first?” You ask, sitting on the armrest where Dottore is seated. 
Dottore chuckles, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you onto his lap. “It looks like you subconsciously made your decision already, kitten. The others can wait.” He states, smirking at the other men in the room.
Itto shoots up from his spot. “Hey, that’s not fair!”
Dottore shrugs, shooting a shit-eating grin in Itto’s direction before continuing to have you wrapped up in his arms. When Itto opens his mouth to protest once more, Thoma pats his shoulders and shakes his head as if he’s telling Itto to let it slide for now. Itto grumbles and slumps in his seat, hugging the plush onikabuto to his chest with a pout.
Ayato clears his throat. “How about this? Each of us gets to have our turn with [Y/N] for twenty minutes,” Ayato suggests.
Ororon sighs, resting his head on the armrest. “There’s over thirty of us in the room. Do you really think we’ll be sitting here for hours just to have our turn to snuggle with [Y/N]?” Ororon grumbles, narrowing his eyes at Dottore.
Sitting near the fireplace, Sethos props his feet on the ottoman and chuckles. “Heck, if that means I get my chance to snuggle with my cuddle bug, I don’t mind waiting for my turn,” Sethos says, winking at you.
Heat rushes to your cheeks as you sink farther against Dottore’s chest. Dottore’s chuckle rings in your ears, causing your face to feel even hotter. Kinich sighs, leaning back against the sofa while Ajaw nags his ears off about who knows what. Kinich briefly glances at you before something catches his attention. Kinich suddenly sits up straight, leans forward, and squints at you for a moment.
You can’t help but squirm under his gaze, feeling slightly awkward now that the others are starting to realize what Kinich is doing. Everyone’s eyes are all on you, trying to see what Kinich is staring at aside from you. 
You awkwardly clear your throat. “Is there something on my face?” You mutter, subconsciously reaching up to your face, feeling around for anything. Aside from the skincare products Xiao and Zhongli bought for you a few days ago while in Liyue, you feel nothing. 
“Are you alright by any chance?” Kinich asks, now standing in front of you and Dottore.
You blink up at Kinich owlishly before nodding your head. “Yeah, I’m okay! W-Why did you ask?”
Kinich continues to scrutinize you, his eyes scanning you from head to toe— looking at the smallest details on you. Kinich reaches forward and caresses your face in his hands, catching you off guard. You gulp, internally praying that he doesn’t notice the bandaids hidden beneath your turtleneck.
Kinich tilts your head up and turns your head from side to side while inspecting every little thing about you. Your heart continues to race in your chest, and your face gets hotter and hotter by the minute. Due to the excessive movement, the collar of your jacket and turtleneck conveniently slide down, making the bandages visible to everyone. 
“What happened to your neck?” Thoma gasps as people start to gather around you.
Kinich lets go of your head and takes a step back when Capitano brushes him to the side. Capitano kneels before you, caressing your face with one hand while unzipping your jacket with the other. Dottore hooks his finger underneath the collar of your turtleneck and pulls it down, revealing more of the bandage wrapped around your neck.
Baizhu furrows his eyebrows, inspecting the bandage. Capitano moves to the side so Baizhu can take a closer look at your supposed “injury.” You nervously peek from Baizhu’s shoulders, locking eyes with Zhongli and Neuvillette. The two men stand side by side, not saying a word. Are they going to let you handle this situation alone!? How are they so calm when you’re internally panicking?!
Baizhu pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs softly. “[Y/N], sweetheart, if you’re injured, you do not need to hide it from any of us— especially me. Your wounds could get infected if they’re not treated properly,” Baizhu chides, sitting at the edge of the seat beside Dottore while eyeing your bandaged neck.
“I’ll remove the bandages so Dr. Baizhu can properly treat your injury,” Capitano says, reaching for the corner of the peachy-beige bandage, ready to peel it off when you suddenly grab his wrist, stopping him.
You shake your head, eyes wide. “You don’t have to! I’m fine, I promise!” You squeak.
Pierro crosses his arms over his chest, scrutinizing you. “If you’re fine, then you would be okay with us taking the bandage off to inspect the wound,” Pierro says gruffly.
You swallow the lump in your throat, hesitantly releasing Capitano’s wrists and letting your hands fall onto your lap. Capitano proceeds to peel off the bandage, only to reveal another layer beneath. Capitano pauses and looks at you, not saying anything.
Xiao huffs. “If you were truly okay, then you wouldn’t need to have more than one layer of bandaid around your neck,” Xiao grumbles, crossing his arms over his chest.
Capitano continues where he left off, gently removing the bandage from your neck. You squeeze your eyes shut, knowing you will not be able to handle the other’s reaction to the marks on your neck. Once the bandage slowly reveals what’s underneath it, you hear sharp gasps from the men in the room.
Kaveh pushes Capitano out of the way while muttering an apology before ripping the bandage off completely, revealing two bite marks on each side of your neck. Kaveh gasps in horror, his eyes bugging out of his head.
“What kind of monster did this to you!?” Kaveh screams, cupping your cheeks in his hands as he forces you to look at him in the eyes.
Al Haitham sighs, pinching the space between his eyebrows while shaking his head. “For once, can you relax?” Al Haitham mutters, glaring at the blond architect. 
Kaveh ignores Al Haitham’s comment as he continues to examine the bite marks on your neck. Kaveh gently brushes the marks on your neck, causing you to wince and softly hiss at the contact. Kaveh looks at Baizhu, giving him a pleading look. 
Pantalone adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose. “I’m no doctor, but the bite marks look fresh. It looks irritated,” Pantalone mutters, stroking his chin.
“Who did this to you?” Tighnari asks.
You swallow the lump in your throat, heat rushing to your cheeks as you try to muster up an excuse. Surely, if the others knew who did this to you, they wouldn’t be too upset, would they? How are you supposed to explain this to the others when the perpetrators don’t look apologetic in the slightest? Heck, they look smug that the others found out about the bite marks on your neck. 
“Those look like deep puncture holes. I don’t believe normal human teeth could do this,” Cyno mutters, pulling you out of your thoughts. 
Gorou’s eyes widen as he nods. “You’re right! There’s no way any of us could have inflicted this type of… injury on [Y/N]!”
Heizou’s eyes light up as he walks toward you, his eyes remaining on your neck. “If you look closely, the teeth marks aren’t the same. One bite is larger than the other, and the canines don’t exactly match up. However, they seem to have a specific intention when leaving said bite marks on [Y/N]’s neck,” Heizou says, stroking his chin. 
For the next five minutes, the men talk among themselves, trying to figure out who or what could have given you the bite marks. They continue to look and examine you, making you feel like a strange phenomenon they have ever laid their eyes on. Well, technically, you sort of are one because you’re not from their world. 
“If you don’t mind me asking, how did you get those marks on your neck?” Aether asks, plopping down beside you.
You shift on Dottore’s lap, clearing your throat. “Uh…” you trail off, rubbing the back of your neck while subconsciously looking over at the two refined men two feet in front of you. For once, they’re not avoiding each other (well, Zhongli was the one avoiding). They stand beside each other, gazing at you intently, their eyes occasionally shifting to the marks on your neck. Of course, they’re not speaking to each other. They’re trying to keep up an act.
Wriothesley raises his eyebrows. “Why do you keep looking at Monsieur Neuvillette and Mister Zhongli? Surely they’re not the ones who left those marks on you, are they?” Wriothesley sarcastically asks, crossing his arms over his chest. 
“So? Are you going to tell us how you got those marks on your throat?” Aether asks, shaking his head.
You have an inkling feeling that Aether knows who the culprits are but doesn’t want to say it. You look elsewhere, trying to come up with an excuse. While trying to find the excuse, you start to think about what led to you getting marked by the Chief Justice of Fontaine and the Funeral Consultant. 
- Less than 24 hours ago -
Zhongli has offered to take you to Chenyu Vale after hearing you rave about the tea set Shenhe and Ganyu have gifted you when visiting the abode. Of course, the trip Zhongli initially planned was going to be just you and him. However, the Chief Justice of Fontaine wanted to tag along, and since Zhongli didn’t want to be rude, Zhongli reluctantly agreed to turn the trip for two into a trip for three.
“Ooh, twenty Chenyu Adeptea for fifteen hundred Mora?” You murmur, stroking your chin while the vendor talks your ears off. 
Neuvillette grabs you by the shoulders before steering you away from the stall while clearing his throat. “While it may seem like a great deal, I wouldn’t recommend it,” Neuvillette mutters, ignoring the glare the merchant shoots in his direction.
“But it’s the same tea that Ganyu and Shenhe gifted me!” You protest, attempting to look at the stall, but Neuvillette shakes his head, turning your head to make you face forward.
Neuvillette sighed, muttering about merchants trying to lure unsuspecting victims into a scam— a scam he had once fallen for a year prior during Lantern Rite. Neuvillette looks around, searching for a certain idiot Archon Funeral Consultant around the area. Footsteps approaching you and Neuvillette grab both your and the Iudex’s attention. 
Zhongli raises his eyebrows upon seeing the expression on Neuvillette’s face. “Is everything alright?” Zhongli crosses his arms over his chest.
You point at the stall behind you and Neuvillette. “Someone was selling packs of Adeptea for a great price! I was about to buy some, but Neuvillette steered me away from the merchant!” You explain, visibly upset.
Zhongli opens his mouth to scold Neuvillette, only for the Iudex to move out of the way to show the merchant and his stall. Upon laying his eyes on the familiar stall, Zhongli sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. For once, Zhongli is glad that Neuvillette decides to tag along on this trip. Who knows how much Mora you’ll end up spending and getting scammed in the end?
You continue to pout at Zhongli and Neuvillette, muttering about wanting to return to the abode with large quantities of Adeptea. Zhongli gestures to Neuvillette, letting the Iudex know that he’s got this handled. 
Zhongli approaches you, grabs your hand, and tucks your hair behind your ear with a small smile. “Dearest, we’ve been out and about in Chenyu Vale for quite some time now. Are you hungry by any chance?” Zhongli asks, gazing at you intently. 
“Huh. Now that I think about it, I am a little bit hungry…” you trail off, feeling your stomach rumble. “Yeah, I’m hungry.” You turn to Neuvillette, “What about you? Are you hungry as well, Neuvillette?”
The Chief Justice of Fontaine nearly cries with happiness. Not only is your attention taken away from the scam of a merchant, but you three are finally eating something after being away from the abode for hours. Granted, he did eat something prior to the trip, but walking around for hours can make a person hungry. 
Neuvillette nods, “Yes, I am feeling quite peckish myself,” Neuvillette replies.
Zhongli ignores Neuvillette’s response to your question as he smiles and caresses the back of your head before slipping his hands into yours and pulling you towards a small pavilion. “I know just a place to satiate your hunger.”
Neuvillette sighs, rolling his eyes. Even though the idiot Funeral Consultant reluctantly agreed to have Neuvillette join in on this trip, Neuvillette does not appreciate the fact that he was the third wheel on this trip. Being the angel that you are, you make sure that both Neuvillette and Zhongli get the same shared attention.
Everything else after ends up being a blur for you. You don’t remember what you ordered at the small restaurant, but you do remember drinking a particular tea that is not of Chenyu Vale origin— well, it’s not grown locally. The tea has an earthy taste with a hint of sweetness to it. It’s not your cup of tea (hehehe, get it? Cyno would be so proud of you), but it’s not like you hate it.
After eating and taking a small break from your once-in-a-century exercise, you, Zhongli, and Neuvillette stop by various stalls around Chenyu Vale.
Despite the beautiful region being known for its tea, the three of you ended up coming across an interesting stall. The merchant is selling fragrances from all over Teyvat. Neuvillette and Zhongli have no interest in fragrances, but they’re quite intrigued by the ones you would pick up and examine with curiosity.
“Ah! I see you’re looking at the Glaze Lily and Rainbow Rose fragrance! It’s quite popular among the female population in Chenyu Vale!” says the merchant, her eyes gleaming with excitement.
You grab a slip of white paper from the stand and spray the perfume onto the paper before taking a whiff of the popular fragrance. You close your eyes, taking in the scent. It smells lovely. The Glaze Lily and Rainbow Rose scented perfume reminds you of the two men standing behind you— not because the flowers are from the two men’s respective regions, but because they go well together, if that makes sense. 
The merchant leans on the stall, gazing at you curiously. “According to my customers, the scent varies from person to person. One customer told me she can smell Glaze Lily more than the Rainbow Rose. On the other hand, a recent customer informed me that she can smell the Rainbow Rose more than the Glaze Lily!”
You open your eyes and tilt your head, confused. You can smell both the Glaze Lily and Rainbow Rose— none of the scents were overtaking the other. While the perfume is quite fragrant and lovely, you don’t think this is for you. Plus, it’s pretty popular among the Chenyu Vale women, and you want something a little more… original. You want a signature scent that no other person on Teyvat can mimic. 
“I can smell both the Glaze Lily and Rainbow Rose just fine. However, this fragrance isn’t for me. Do you have something unique? I want something original, something people cannot mimic,” you say, placing the perfume down on the stall.
The woman strokes her chin before squatting down, digging through the stall while you rock back and forth on the balls of your feet. Even though this trip is initially for the Adeptea, you couldn’t help but feel drawn to the fragrance stall. Something about it captivates your attention and makes you want to buy something— definitely not because the fragrance bottles are beautiful (it is).
You peek at Neuvillette and Zhongli, scratching the back of your head with a sheepish smile. “Sorry if this is taking a while. I wanted something unique for myself,” you mutter, feeling heat rush to your cheeks.
Neuvillette smiles and strokes your hair. “There is nothing to apologize for, my dear. It’s not like we’re in a rush to return to the estate,” Neuvillette replies.
Zhongli nods, approaching you and Neuvillette. “I have booked us an inn for the night. We will not be able to return to the abode around this time, especially in weather like this,” Zhongli says, gazing at the now gray skies.
Your eyes widen at the realization. If the three of you have to stay at an inn for the night, how is that going to turn out? Speaking of the inn, will you three have separate bedrooms? Since Zhongli booked the room, are you sharing a room with Zhongli, and does Neuvillette have his own room? Or—
The merchant’s head peeks from the stall, her eyes wide with excitement. “I have found just the scent for you, my dear customer!” The woman fixes her disheveled hair before handing you a round perfume bottle. 
The bottle is a periwinkle color with gold and silver flecks scattered around the bottle. Silver vines wrapped around the bottle, and on those vines are cor lapis and noctilucous jade carved to look like blooming flowers. Zhongli raises his eyebrows while scrutinizing the bottle in your hands.
“If you don’t mind me asking, miss, what makes this fragrance special out of all the fragrances you sell?” Zhongli asks, never taking his eyes off the bottle.
You continue to examine the perfume bottle, enchanted by the appearance of the bottle. It has a sparkly squeeze bulb, tempting you into spraying it onto yourself. You and the merchant make eye contact. The woman grins and gestures to you to try it out yourself. You shrug, not thinking much of it, before pointing the perfume bottle at yourself and squeezing the squeeze bulb. You wince when you realize you sprayed way more than you intended.
“This fragrance is unique because whoever is wearing this scent will not only smell enchanting on the wearer, but only a small handful of people will be… charmed by the scent and the wearer,” she says, nodding with satisfaction.
You sniff the perfume, trying to figure out what the notes are. You’re no perfume expert, but it does have a bit of a unique smell to it. Zhongli and Neuvillette raise their eyebrows at the woman’s strange explanation of the so-called “unique” fragrance. 
“I don’t think this perfume is something I was looking for. Perhaps it’s not meant to be,” You sigh, handing the bottle back to the woman.
The woman frowns, taking the bottle from your hands and storing it in the cabinet of the stall. You, Zhongli, and Neuvillette bid the woman goodbye before heading to the inn. What a shame. You thought you were going to return to the abode with new perfume to wear, but you weren’t too fond of the scent of the perfume. It has an earthy scent, almost reminding you of what the air would smell like after heavy rain. If you remember correctly, there is a hint of mint and maybe Qingxin, if you’re not mistaken.
Zhongli wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you close to him. “Mora for your thoughts?”
“Oh, it’s nothing! I’m just a little disappointed that I ended up not buying anything from the fragrance merchant. It’s a shame the ‘unique’ fragrance isn’t as nearly special as what she made it out to be,” you reply, allowing Zhongli to steer you to your next destination as the skies get darker.
Neuvillette walks beside you, almost sandwiching you between him and Zhongli. The Chief Justice of Fontaine drapes his arm over your shoulder, giving them a comforting squeeze. “I understand that you’re disappointed about the outcome, but think of it this way: you have plenty of Mora to spend before we return to the estate tomorrow afternoon,” Neuvillette says.
You stop in your tracks, letting his words sink in. Neuvillette’s not wrong, and besides, you still haven’t bought the Adeptea you’ve been wanting to buy. After all, that was the point of your trip to Chenyu Vale, but the three of you were sidetracked by the things around you. You guess this is what happens if you travel with men older than Teyvat. 
You take three steps forward before turning to look at Zhongli and Neuvillette. “What you said is true, but I guess that is tomorrow me’s problem,” you shrug, “anyway, let’s go to the inn! It’s starting to sprinkle out here!” You grab their wrists before dragging them towards the large building.
The gust of wind allows both men behind you to catch a whiff of the perfume you sprayed on yourself. They freeze in their tracks, and the grips on your hands tighten, causing you to stumble back into them. 
You blink, craning your head up to see what they’re doing. Zhongli and Neuvillette bend down to sniff your neck. Goosebumps appear all over your body when you feel them hover near your neck to smell the perfume you have on. The tip of Neuvillette’s nose pokes your neck, making you involuntarily freeze. Their hot breaths fan over your neck, sending shivers down your spine. Heat rushes to your cheeks as you try to remain calm while they continue to sniff your neck like a bloodhound. Without realizing it, Zhongli grabs underneath your chin and tilts your head up, exposing more of your neck.
Zhongli presses his nose against your neck, taking in deep breaths and breathing in the intoxicating scent of the perfume. Neuvillette closes his eyes, burying his nose into your collarbones and letting the smell of the perfume flood into his nose. You gulp, your heart thundering against your chest the more the two men press up against you.
“What’s gotten into you two?” You breathe, letting out a shaky sigh. 
Neuvillette and Zhongli ignore your question as they continue to bury their faces into your neck, occasionally licking and biting your neck. You lay your head on Zhongli’s shoulders while he continues to keep your head tilted back as he peppers kisses from your jawlines to your shoulders. 
“If you two want to have your ways with me, at least do it indoors and not where people can see,” you sputter, feeling heat pool into your lower regions. 
Upon hearing your words, Zhongli and Neuvillette stop what they’re doing and pull you to the inn. Zhongli checks you three into the inn and grabs the keys from the innkeeper’s hands before dragging you to the elevator with Neuvillette at your side. Once the elevator door closes, both men proceed with what they are doing.
Neuvillette stands behind you, his left arm around your waist while his right hand slips underneath your shirt. Zhongli stands before you, cupping your cheeks with both hands and pressing his lips against yours, devouring your lips. Zhongli grabs your right leg and wraps it around his waist, grinding against you. Your jaws drop, eyes rolling to the back of your head. Zhongli takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, grinding harder against your heat.
Before things can escalate, the elevator bell chimes, alerting the three of you that you have arrived at the floor where your rooms reside. Neuvillette and Zhongli drags you out of the elevator and to the room where you three will be staying. Now that you have some time to process what happened in the elevator, you can’t help but notice prominent tents forming in Zhongli and Neuvillette’s pants.
Neuvillette tosses you over his shoulders while Zhongli unlocks the door to the room. Once the door unlocks, Zhongli and Neuvillette step into the room. Neuvillette closes the door with his foot and locks the door without looking. You lay limp over Neuvillette’s shoulders. A wave of embarrassment washes over you when you feel how soaked your panties are.
Neuvillette tosses you onto the bed, making you bounce. You scan the room of the inn you’re staying at, realizing there’s only one bed in the room. Now that you think about it, Zhongli didn’t hand an extra key for another room at the inn. It seems like Zhongli never booked extra rooms— the three of you are going to sleep in the same bed for the night at the inn.
You prop yourself up on the bed, gazing at both men with wide eyes after seeing that they have removed their coats and are in the process of taking their gloves off and rolling their sleeves up to their elbows. 
“What has gotten into you two? You two are acting like you’re in a rut!” You squeak.
Neuvillette chuckles, shaking his head. “There��s nothing to worry about, dearest. Are we, your lovers, not allowed to savor this moment between us?” Neuvillette asks.
You warily look at Neuvillette. “I’m not against having intimate moments with both of you, but you two are acting strange,” you murmur. “It’s not like you two to display such affection in public. I am not against it, but you two are usually composed.”
Zhongli clears his throat, unbuttoning his shirt to expose his bare chest. “Forgive me, my dear. The perfume you have on is quite intoxicating. I cannot help but feel like I’m under a spell when I catch a whiff of the fragrance,” Zhongli says, now standing at the edge of the bed.
Zhongli rests one knee on the bed before grabbing you by the ankles. Without warning, Zhongli yanks you towards the edge, emitting a surprised squeak from you. Zhongli chuckles and rubs your cheek with his thumb before leaning down to pepper your face with gentle kisses. Zhongli grabs your hand and laces his fingers with yours before pressing his lips against yours.
While you and Zhongli kiss, Neuvillette kneels before you and spreads your legs apart. Neuvillette slides his hands underneath the bands of your shorts before roughly tugging them down to your ankles and tossing them behind him. The Chief Justice of Fontaine then loops his index and middle finger around the bands of your panties, sliding them down your legs, gulping at the sight of your dripping entrance.
Neuvillette licks his lips before spreading your legs wider, leans forward, and latches his lips onto your entrance. You break your and Zhongli’s kiss, gasping when you feel Neuvillette’s warm tongue lapping and swirling at your entrance. Zhongli takes that as an opportunity to unbuckle his belt and unzip his pants. You softly whimper when Neuvillette penetrates your heat with his tongue while pressing his nose against the engorged and throbbing nerve.
Zhongli groans after freeing his throbbing cocks from his underwear. Your eyes grow wide, completely forgetting that Zhongli has more than one cock. Fuck, how could you forget so easily? Wait, if Zhongli has two of them, does that mean Neuvillette also has two cocks? What if he has more than two?
Zhongli taps your lips with the tip of his cock, signaling you to open your mouth. You open your mouth and stick your tongue out. Zhongli slides his cock into your mouth, moaning when the warmth of your mouth engulfs his cock. While sucking Zhongli’s cock, you reach for his second cock and begin pumping it at a steady pace. 
You nearly choke on Zhongli’s dick when you feel something penetrate your wet heat. You turn to see Neuvillette gently sliding his index and middle finger into your entrance, slow enough not to hurt you. He stretches your entrance, making sure you’re ready for what’s to come. Zhongli pushes your head down on his cock, making you swallow more. You wince, nearly gagging. You pause for a moment and close your eyes, trying to collect yourself.
You pull away from Zhongli’s cock before bringing the other one into your mouth to continue where you have left off. Zhongli wipes the stray tear in the corner of your eyes, pressing a kiss on your head as a silent apology for being a teeny bit rough on you. Even though he wasn’t rough on you in the slightest, he didn’t want to cause you any discomfort while doing anything intimate with you.
Neuvillette pulls away from your groin, pulling his fingers out of your entrance. Neuvillette sucks on his soaked fingers, maintaining eye contact with you while your mouth is occupied with sucking Zhongli’s second cock. Neuvillette stands up and unbuckles his belt, unzips his pants, and pulls his pants and underwear down. Unsurprisingly, two cocks spring from the confinement of his pants, slapping his lower abdomen. The mushroom tips of his cock are bright red and leaking with pre-cum. 
Oh, you are not going to make it out alive. Hell, someone’s going to have to carry around Chenyu Vale and back to the abode after today. You subconsciously pull Zhongli’s cock out of your mouth and glance at Zhongli’s cocks, then at Neuvillette’s cocks. Who has bigger dicks between the two of them?
Zhongli raises his eyebrows at you, pulling your hair into a ponytail and tilting your head up. “What are you thinking about?” Zhongli mutters, his voice thick with lust.
You stare at Zhongli, trying to come up with an excuse. Neuvillette chuckles, rubbing his hands on your thighs as he parts your legs. Neuvillette grabs one of his cocks and rubs them against your folds, coating his aching cock with your slick. 
You shake your head, heat rushing to your cheeks. “I wanted to know what’s causing you two to act this way, that’s all,” you finally sputter out an excuse.
Zhongli continues to gaze at you with a raised eyebrow, tapping your bottom lip with the tip of his cock. You reluctantly open your mouth, still hoping that Zhongli bought your poor excuse of a response. While you are curious about what made Zhongli and Neuvillette act so strange, like an animal in a rut, you don’t want the two men to get competitive over who has a bigger package. 
After a few minutes of Neuvillette rubbing his cock between your folds, Neuvillette nudges your entrance with the bulbous tip of his cock. You’re too busy sucking and licking Zhongli’s cock to notice that Neuvillette is about to bury his cock inside you. Without warning, Neuvillette slides his thick cock into your pulsating entrance. The smooth and moist walls of your entrance clenches around Neuvillette’s cock, making him tense and bury his face into your neck, groaning. After Neuvillette is balls deep inside you, he relaxes and reaches for your hand, lacing his fingers with yours. 
“You’re very tight; relax for me, dearest,” Neuvillette murmurs into your ears, his chest rapidly rising and falling. 
You whimper, taking Zhongli’s cock out of your mouth while writhing beneath Neuvillette’s body. “It hurts, Neuvillette,” you whine, squeezing your eyes shut as you dig your nails into his back.
Neuvillette kisses the side of your head as he reassures you. Neuvillette reaches down and starts pinching and rubbing your swollen bundle of nerves. You squeeze and pulse around his cock, both legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer to you. You and Neuvillette groan when Neuvillette is now buried at the hilt. 
Neuvillette wraps his arms around your waist before pulling you farther up the bed. Neuvillette lays on his back with you lying on top of him. He tangles his fingers in your hair before crashing his lips against yours. While you and Neuvillette are messily making out, Zhongli completely strips off his clothes and comes up behind you.
Zhongli lifts his hand and slaps your right ass cheek, causing you to jolt and break the kiss between you and Neuvillette. Zhongli chuckles and shakes his head, placing both hands on your waist before gently bouncing you on Neuvillette’s cock. You softly moan, slowly riding Neuvillette’s cock with the help of Zhongli. 
Once you’re used to Neuvillette’s size, you start to take over, increasing the speed. Neuvillette wraps one arm around your waist while the other is on your shoulder, forcing you to stay in one place as he pistons his cock into your wet heat. 
Your slick trails down your leg, soaking Neuvillette’s pubic hairs and lap. Neuvillette takes the opportunity to slide his second cock into the same hole, causing you to tense and dig your nails into his shoulders.
Zhongli spreads your ass cheeks and spits. He reaches down and gathers your slick and rubs your ass hole. You knew this day would come, but you didn’t know that it was going to happen today. You squeeze your eyes shut and bury your face in Neuvillette’s neck after feeling Zhongli’s cock probing at your ass. 
Zhongli slowly inserts his cock, stretching out your ass. You groan and bite down on Neuvillette’s shoulders, sending shivers down Neuvillette’s spine. As Zhongli continues to slowly sink his cock into your ass, Neuvillette licks your neck and takes a deep whiff of the intoxicating scent of your skin and the perfume. Neuvillette continues to thrust his cocks into your entrance; the sound of skin-to-skin and squelching fills the air, accompanied by occasional moans and whimpers from the three of you.
Zhongli gathers your hair into a ponytail and tilts your head to the side, revealing your neck to him. Zhongli leans down and presses his nose against your neck, taking deep breaths before letting out a breathy moan in your ears. Zhongli squeezes your chest with his unoccupied hand, rutting into your backside.
Zhongli and Neuvillette make eye contact and glare at each other. Zhongli looks away, gritting his teeth while Neuvillette continues to hammer his cocks into your heat. Zhongli stares at your neck for a moment, gradually slowing his pace. 
Should he do it? Zhongli shakes his head, trying to ignore the voices in his head that are trying to convince him to mark you— claim you as his and only his. Zhongli thrusts hard, causing you to jolt forward and moan like an absolute whore. 
“Fuck, Zhongli!” You whine, blindly reaching behind you to grip his bicep.
Fuck it. Zhongli buries his face into your neck and bites down on your neck. Your eyes widen, and you let out a strained gasp, whimpering in pain. Tears pool in your eyes the harder Zhongli bites down on your neck, drawing blood.
Neuvillette glares at Zhongli before mimicking Zhongli’s actions. The Chief Justice of Fontaine gently kisses the other side of your neck before biting your neck just as hard as Zhongli. You wail, thrashing in Zhongli and Neuvillette’s arms as they refuse to let go of your neck. You feel warm liquid gushing from your neck and streaming down your collarbones and chest.
It takes you approximately five minutes to realize that there’s a tight knot forming in your lower abdomen the more Zhongli and Neuvillette continue to piston their two cocks into your holes while biting your neck like a feral animal. Before you know it, the knot in your lower abdomen snaps, sending you into momentary bliss as you cum around Neuvillette’s cocks.
You don’t remember what happens after that. If you have to think hard, you’re certain that Zhongli and Neuvillette switch places to continue to rail you through the night at the inn. Whoever’s in the nearby rooms, you sincerely apologize for causing a disturbance with your two lovers. You really hope you won’t get a complaint letter or call from the innkeeper. 
- Present -
Kazuha waves his hand in front of your face after you blanked out for who knows how long. “Hello? Are you still here with us?” Kazuha teasingly asks, chuckling.
You snap out of your thoughts and clear your throat, looking away. There’s no way in hell you’re telling them the truth about how you got the bite marks on your neck. Albedo and Baizhu nudge the others away from you to give them room to inspect the bite marks on your neck. Baizhu sighs and tilts your head side to side to get a better look while Changsheng scrutinizes you— oh, the snake knows the perpetrators. You give the snake a pleading look, hoping she won’t rat Neuvillette and Zhongli out.
Changsheng shakes her head with disapproval. “It’ssss quite obvioussss how [Y/N] received thosssse markssss on their neck,” Changsheng says, twisting her head to glance over at Neuvillette and Zhongli, narrowing her eyes at them.
“Oh? And who do you think it could be, Changsheng?” Lyney asks, raising his eyebrows at the white snake draping over Baizhu’s shoulders with interest and curiosity. 
You contemplate whether you should lunge at Changsheng to keep her mouth shut, but you decide not to do it because you know that will make you look suspicious— well, even more suspicious than you already seem. Albedo hums, cleaning the bite marks on your neck before briefly pausing.
You look at Albedo, worried, “What’s with that look on your face?”
Albedo chuckles, shaking his head. “It’s nothing to worry about, [Y/N]. But the bite marks around your neck should be healed within a few days to a week. Depending on how deep the bites are, it could take up to almost a month for it to be healed,” Albedo says, handing the white gauze to Baizhu.
You’re not entirely sure if the bites will heal because when you glanced in the mirror, the bite marks were glowing. Even though the ache didn’t last as long, it does ache a lot— probably not as much as yesterday, but it’s aching. 
“The two of you bit [Y/N], didn’t you?” Wriothesley asks, raising his eyebrows at Zhongli and Neuvillette, the corner of his lips quirking up.
Neuvillette clears his throat, crossing his arms over his chest. “I would do no such thing,” Neuvillette replies.
Everyone in the room raises their eyebrows at the Chief Justice of Fontaine, not believing his response. Zhongli, on the other hand, sighs and chooses not to reply to Wriothesley’s comment. Despite choosing to stay silent, the red ears and cheekbones say another.
Childe pokes the inside of his cheek with his tongue, glaring at Zhongli and Neuvillette, steam practically coming from his ears. You shut your eyes, hoping no one will start a fight after discovering who marked you.
“I can’t believe you two marked [Y/N] before I did!” Childe exclaims. “I should be the first one to do it, not you two!”
You pinch the bridge of your nose, temples beginning to throb as more people start to shout in agreement. Great, now your body is going to be littered with marks from these men. It’s not like you mind it… you’re just worried about who will try to make theirs more prominent for other people to see. You peek at Zhongli and Neuvillette, only to see them subtly smile at each other. Your mouth is agape after realization dawns on you. 
They planned this entire thing.
Note: I understand that Neuvillette is probably not older than Teyvat like Zhongli, but for the sake of this fic, he is now. Wow, this is the final fanfic of the year and the first smut in forever. My goal for 2025 is to hopefully write and post more fanfics! And catch up with Genshin and HSR quests. The next fanfic I will be posting after this one is a Love&Deepspace one! Oh! Before I reopen my Discord server, I am looking for new moderators for my server! So, if you are interested in being a moderator for my server, here is the link to the form [HERE]! The deadline is January 7th, 2025! ^^ If you are chosen, I or one of my moderators will contact you through either Tumblr, Discord, or AO3 before the server is reopened! Anyway, To all my new and returning readers, keep in mind that I ONLY post on my Tumblr (Genshinluvr), Ko-Fi (Genshinluvr/Aaliah_exo), and my AO3 (Aaliah_exo)! Nowhere else except Tumblr and AO3!
Taglist: @uniquecutie-puffs, @rubyninja1, @loveariel
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